A lesson in history

Okay, so not only was anatomy NOT a strong topic for me, but history was also not so great. This came to light for Brandon one night when we were watching the food channel. We love the food chanel.

So, I was laying in bed while Brandon was folding his clothes. The Throw Down with Bobby Flay was on and they were doing a Philadelphia cheese steak cook off. For their guest judge, they had none other than Benjamin Franklin himself. Me, in my Amy-moment-fashion, says to Brandon "That's not really him, is it?" note the question mark. and damned if I didn't say it in question tone too. When Brandon turned and looked at me, the look on his face gave me the answer to my question. then he asks "are you serious?"

I pulled the blanket over my head and wondered why I couldn't have made that a statement rather than a question. Did you know that Benjamin Franklin is long passed? and I have to say, although I've obviously never seen the man, it was a damn good look-alike. so there. that's my defense.


Women make the world go 'round

Yes. yes they do. I'm fortunate to be surrounded with strong intelligent women. I have been all my life. I know I've spoken a lot about my Grampa Shorty, but really, he and I couldn't have had all our shinanigans without my Gramma Bernie. My sister and my gramma were always together shopping and what not, whereas I would choose to get muddy and cause chaos with Grampa.

Even so, Gramma did take us girls on "dates". We'd go to movies... Gramma would bring the largest purse ever and fill it with candy bars and sodas... :) sorry movie theatres! She'd take us shopping. We'd get a set amount of money and get to pick out whatever we wanted for Christmas, but then Gramma would take the gifts and wrap them... by the time Christmas rolled around, we'd have mostly forgotten what we purchased. We'd go to the local pizza parlor and Gramma would bring lots of quarters so we could play Ms. Packman and Gallaga!!! ah yeah. We'd go to Circus Circus (a large arcade). Again with lots of quarters, but we also happened to have a close family friend that worked there and he'd bring us buckets of tokens and tickets to play and win all kinds of crazy toys. We'd be there for hours. Gramma would just sit and drink coffee in the dining area and us girls would just go until we got bored.

When Gramma wasn't entertaining us kids or shopping with Angie, she was working - or cleaning - or roofing the house - or cleaning the cars - or sweeping the porch. Seriously, if I had a fraction of the energy of that woman, I'd.... probably drive Brandon more nutz. :) And she still does all of that. She still works; full time. She loves to work and stay busy. Gramma did take several years off of work to care for Grampa when his health deteriorated. Amazing the stuff she put up with to care for him - and apparently he wasn't the easiest patient - imagine that!? :)

Gramma always has worked later hours - getting home several hours after most kids should be sound asleep. Grampa and I would wait in the front window to see Gramma's headlights turn into the drive so we could turn on the yard light for her and greet her. She'd come in and promptly proceed to make us dinner. Yes, that's right. She just worked a full day and got home late at night, only to make us dinner - we had a long day too of... playing, afterall. We'd eat things like fried egg sandwiches, mashed potatoes with creamed corn, braunschweger sandwiches with butter... just really yummy, nutritious, late night food. :)

What's with Gramma's and food? :) Gramma Bernie always stocked the house for us with all sorts of goodies. Angie and I each had our own cupboard fully stocked with all our favorite snacks. Slim Jims were always a hot commodity.

Gramma managed to keep us well fed, and entertained and with the house kept, working full time, all while putting up with Grampa Shorty and maintianing her class. She's truly a classy lady.

Who the heck invented stairs?

Stairs are my nemisis. You'd think it's an easy concept. You navigate them by going up one step at a time, or going down, one step at a time. Sounds simple enough... but oh no, I haven't mastered this concept. I think it's mostly because I'm careless or rushing or... maybe it goes back to when I was a kid and I'd run full speed in one direction while looking in the opposite direction. yep, that sounds right.

I fall down stairs. I fall up stairs.(yes, it can be done) I've forgotten that there are just two more stairs before the bottom - this can really hurt. There isn't a week that goes by that I don't yell out in pain after a loud thunk of some sort and Brandon comes running "Amy? Are you all right?" I only hear my real name when I'm in trouble or out of concern. 8 out of 10 times, it involves stairs. They hate me.

I can laugh at myself, and as I've mentioned, I also enjoy laughing at others. And I'm not the only one who's ate it on the stairs.

When I was an evil teenager (as all teens are) I lived with my Dad and his then girlfriend, Sue. Her and I were home alone, I was in my room - my teenage lair, when all of a sudden I heard and felt the vibration of a loud "thunk-a-bump-a-thunk-a-bump-a-thunk" and then nothing. silence.

So, I go to investigate. I called out "Sue?" and heard nothing. I went over and stood at the top of the stairs leading down to the basement, and there she was. Laying at the very bottom looking up at me, arms and legs spread out.

I couldn't contain myself. I started laughing so hard and I knew, just knew she would NOT be amused at my deep amusement... so I had to walk away. Yes, I'm awful for not having helped her up. But seriously, it rendered me... useless. Because I was caught in a fit of laughter and could not function. Maybe it's just me, but after hearing the thunks and looking down at her spread out at the bottom, it just struck me as damn funny. Sorry Sue! I'm glad you weren't truly hurt.

Ass over tea-kettle

One day, several years ago, my late Great-Gramma Mable (Dad's Gramma) had been diagnosed with breast cancer (not so funny, I know, but just wait...) Gramma was into her 90's and old age was taking it's toll, such as hearing.

As a family, we took Gramma Mable to her appointment to have this cancer removed. So, Grampa Vern drove with Great-Gramma Mable in the passenger seat and Gramma Adele perched in the center of the back seat, leaning forward to speak directly into Great-Gramma's ear. Dad and I followed in a seperate car.

As we were waiting to take a left turn across oncoming traffic into the hospital lot, Grampa decided to go for it. Seriously, this makes me chuckle. So he guns the gas of his Cadillac and the car lurches forward and left, while Gramma Adele goes ass over teakettle backwards in the back seat. All I could see was her feet go up in the air and then..... no more Gramma.

Oh, I cried so hard becuase I was laughing so hysterically. Needless to say, my grampa really got a tongue lashing which only enhanced my amusement. We were in the lobby, my eyes all puffy and my amusement barely contained, when they walked in. I don't think Gramma had realized that we witnessed it but she did once she saw me.

I don't know what it is, but I just cannot help it. I seriously find other's misfortunes extremely funny. Although my Gramma Adele found little to no amusement in it as she rarely finds Grampa Vern's mishaps funny, it was a welcomed distraction to the day's events and I'll never ever forget the image of her feet in the air! It just tickles me.


As you may have noticed, my grandparents' house was a unique and fun place to be. In fact, my parents had to schedule times for me and my sister to come home so my grandparents could have some time without us kids. While we spent a lot of time at my grandparents', I do have other family...

I've mentioned my sis, AKA: Ang, Nache, Angus, Angela Rae. She's my elder by 4 years and we've not always got along. Especially as kids. She showed little mercy, but I have got to say that after watching back the family videos, I was one annoying little girl. :) in fact, there was one home movie that I was viewing with my husband and he couldn't take it anylonger so he got up and while leaving the room said "boy, you were annoying"... oops.

My Mom, AKA: Bev, Duck, Duck Butt, Momma Poo, Beverly Ann. I hear a lot of "you look just like your mother". My mom is a creative individual. Like my Grampa Shorty (her dad), Mom is quarky and does what she pleases without concern of how she's perceived. She's built a 9' tall rocking chair which she proudly displays in her yard among dozens of other crafty ideas. She can make anything "hillbilly style".

My Dad, AKA: Scooter, Scee-Wee, Scott. He's an avid motorcycle rider, snow-mobiler, boater, really - he does all the activities that I love. I once went skydiving with Dad in AZ when I was 16 (I mean.. cough.. cough.. Angie did since she would've been the one of age) :) We went to Sturgis together for a few years too. Dad always said I rode my motorcycle like I stole it, but hey, I learned from the best! I've since sold my bike. :(

My Grandparents (Dad's side) AKA: The Folks, Vern & Adele, Gramma or Gram and Grampa. creative, I know. They've always lived "up north" on a lake in the warmer climates and in the past 10 years or so have traveled to AZ in the winter months. I love visiting them. Gramma has the best cooking ever and Grampa has always had the best toys (what is it with grampas and having lots of toys?!) Upnorth is where I learned to fish (still won't touch anything that moves), four-wheel, boat, water ski, snowmobile, shoot pool, throw darts, shuffle board, etc. As a kid I would bring friends upnorth for a week while my parents were in Sturgis. My husband absolutely loves our trips north and he considers them his grandparents as well.